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Category Archives for "Confidence"

Why I Stopped Wearing Make-up

Today I wanted to talk to you about why I stopped wearing make-up.

I used to wear makeup to make me feel good - I thought. But what it was really doing was making me feel not so good about how I looked without it. So I stopped.

So a couple of months ago I stopped wearing makeup and I stopped wearing makeup because I was looking at my un-made-up face and seeing it as something that I needed to fix about myself.

I thought I looked tired, so I needed to cover up dark circles underneath my eyes. I didn't think "I need more sleep", I just thought "I need to stop looking tired, I need to find a way, cosmetically, to fix that". I stopped wearing makeup because for about thirty years I've been battling with redness in my cheeks and I don't know why, aged 13 or 14, made me think that was a problem that needed to be solved, but there were remedies out there and I used them. Green creams to try and combat the redness, thicker coverage foundations, all of that kind of thing.

As it happens the best thing that I could have done to stop that was to stop wearing makeup.

I stopped wearing makeup because I wasn't comfortable with how my face looked without it and I didn't want people to see it. I had to wear makeup for work because "what would people think of me if I wasn't?" And, as I've talked to women, over the years, at the studio, I've kept hearing the same thing over and over from people "I don't like my face", and I thought "that...that's me, that's how I feel about my face".

So, I've stopped wearing makeup to make myself get used to how my face looks, and some days I look tired, and some days my cheeks are red. These things do not have an impact on my day. It doesn't make any difference to my life at all.

So, I'm not anti- makeup and I'll happily have a makeover- I don't think anybody should give up makeup. I like wearing makeup but I'm anti how makeup was making me feel about myself.

I stopped wearing makeup not because I believe that I look better or I look perfect without it, but because 

I believe that I don't and I wanted to make myself okay with that.

Much love, 



The difference between a basque and a corset

I get asked this a lot so today I'm talking about the difference between a corset and a basque and which one might work best for you in your boudoir session and why.

Today I want to talk about basques and corsets and specifically the differences between the two, as it's something we get asked about a lot here.

I'm gonna talk about the pros and cons of each and the styles that will work best for a boudoir portrait session.


So basques and corsets can be a really great option because they cover up the stomach area, which is the bit that most of us are concerned about. The biggest difference, as you look at them, is that a basque will tend to have cups in a way that a corset really wont. So the thing to bare in mind is that a basque will tend to give support in a way that a corset isn't going to. The cups of a basque will help to keep your chest in place when you lie down. Now if you have a chest that never moves whatever position you're in, that's not gonna matter to you. But if when you lie down your chest starts to drift to the side then a basque is gonna help to keep everything in place, whereas a corset is gonna be mainly there for standing shots or sitting shots because it's not gonna be doing anything for you when you lie down.


Basques are also much more likely to have straps than corsets, there are some corsets styles around now that have straps but on the whole basques are much more likely to have straps than corsets are.


The other major difference is that corsets have boning in them and they also have lacing at the back which a basque doesn't do. So a basque will hug your natural shape whereas a corset can cinch in your waist and if you love that kind of accentuated hour-glass figure then a corset is gonna help to create that in away that a basque won't.

There are big differences in the boning that corsets have. So, if something is described as a fashion corset it most likely has plastic boning, and that's not gonna be as strong as steel boning. So it probably wont reshape you as much as a steel boned corset will. It may be more comfortable to wear but you have to be more careful because with plastic boning, if you have a stomach that you're trying to keep flat, with plastic boning it can start to ping out, it can start to get bent out of shape in a way that is not really gonna happen with steel boned corset. A proper steel boned corset, you're not gonna be able to bend it out of shape and it's gonna be doing more reshaping for you in the first place.

A proper corset will also, at the back, have a modesty panel on the inside, so no matter how loosely you lace that corset, it's never gonna be lacing directly across your skin.


If you like corsets, then I would absolutely recommend that you go for something with a sweet-heart neckline, a straight across neckline is much more likely to make you look like you've created a shelf. A sweet-heart neckline is gonna give you a really nice shape across your chest. If you have a large chest, that you want to emphasise then a corset is gonna do that job amazingly well for you. If you have a large chest and you really don't want to be showing it off all that much, then go for a basque because it's not going to be cinching in and pushing you up and doing all of that. And you'll also find that often basques will have more padding in the cups so if you've got a smaller chest you're much more likely to get a good fit from a basque than you are from a corset.


With basques the thing to be careful of is the panels at the side, they can be quite sheer or they can be more opaque. If you're like me and when you sit down, you've got fat rolls, then a sheer panel is really not going to be flattering. You want to look for something as opaque as possible because it's just gonna cover up more of what's going on at the side. 

Matching knickers

Also, with basques you mostly get to get matching knickers, which is a huge bonus. You don't tend to get that with a corset so with a corset, doesn't matter if it's a plain black one, you're not gonna have any problems, but if you've gone for a colour that you've then got to match the knickers to, it can be quite tricky.

Either can work really really well, it is a case of trying on and personal reference and if you can't decide, bring one of each, then you've got everything covered. Thank you.

Much love, 



How To Stand Taller In Photos

Today I'm showing you how doing one simple thing can help you look better in photos.

So today I want to talk about standing up straighter in photos and how when you think you're standing up straight, you're probably not, and the difference that it makes to do that in photos.

Mostly when we're in photos we tend to stand possibly with the weight on one particular leg and a hip kicked out to the side and it creates little bulges, if you're anything like me. So it doesn't matter what you really do, which side or the other, it's always gonna have little bulges going on somewhere. So if you stand up straight, it doesn't make a whole lot of difference to all of this that's going on. However, the way to stand up straighter is to suck in, as soon as you suck in then everything raises, it naturally pushes your shoulders back, it raises your chest , and it defines the waist.  It makes a big difference to the stomach and waist area but also it makes a difference to how your shoulders are and how you're generally stood - you can't get that just form standing up straight. You have to suck in at the same time and it'll make you stand up straighter, taller, elongate your torso, bring your chest up, and your shoulders back, and create a better image for you in a photo.

Much love, 



Another Myth About Body Confidence

Today I'm talking about how a lack of confidence can hold you back from doing things you really want to do.

So a couple of weeks ago I talked about one of the big myths about confidence, which is that it's something that you either have or that you don't have and today I want you follow on from that and talk about another big myth about confidence and that's the idea that if someone is doing something, then they must be doing it with confidence.

This is something that holds an awful lot of people back from doing things that they want to do. That though that you feel like you have enough confidence and you look at other people and think "I wish that I could be more like them". But the truth is that most people don't walk around brimming with confidence the entire time. At best they're managing to fake it a little bit better than some of us. So if you think of actors and singers, these are jobs which we would assume require a huge amount of confidence. And yet these people still get stage fright, they're not supremely confident people who can just do anything that they want to without a thought, they're not actually that different to the rest of us, at all.

Being able to act as though you're confident is not the same as actually feeling confident on the inside and that's what most people are doing, they're acting or pretending to have more confidence than they really do.

So if you can let go of the idea that to do whatever it is that you want to do requires some higher level of confidence, that you just don't have and everybody else does. If you think that instead lots of people with no confidence have done this thing then so can I. Then you can start to change how you feel about the thing that you want to do and make it seem more possible to you, because you're aligning yourself with those other people. They weren't confident but they did it anyway, so can I. Hopefully if you can start to do that it'll just start to boost your confidence because when you do things like that, you're slowly moving your comfort zone.

Essentially, fake it 'till you make it, ladies.

Much love, 



How To Make The Perfect YouTube Video (Parody)

Ever wondered what you need to make the perfect YouTube video?
Me too, so I did some research and learned these top tips to share with you.

Hi, so I've been looking into what we can do to get more video views since we're making more videos at the moment.

For starters the ideal thing is to be young and cool, but since the boat's already sailed on that one, I've looked in what else we can do.

The big thing is to make sure that you have some quick edits, be a bit jumpy, because apparently people have an attention span of around about a nano-second and this will JOLT them into attention.  Plus, adding a little beep every time you cut the scene - you don't want them to get bored of watching you. 

Apparently using different locations, especially outdoors is a good idea and if you can give people a bit of an insight into your awesome life then that's good too.  Add in some product placements so that brands know that we're willing to work with them.

The thing is, I'm 44 years old. I don't think I can be bothered with this crap.

I just want to talk to women about feeling good about themselves. I'm just going to leave all the cool stuff to somebody else.